In my defense I started this in early December and finished it in the first week of January. . .just forgot to post it! Enjoy!
As the year draws to a close and the self-reflection, which comes with the start of the New Year, begins, Nina has been gracious enough to let me share a story. At the beginning of this year (2017), I was really having a hard time with life as a whole. Recovering from a series of bad relationships, finishing my degree after putting it off for four plus years, and starting a new job that I knew would offer no real fulfillment but it paid better. Among a cluster of other things, I was grasping for anything that could get me through 2017 or at least January. I can’t remember which random link I was flipping through on Facebook but I came across a horoscope (yah I know) that told me to focus on my relationships with women throughout the coming year. A novel idea, one I would never would have considered for myself based on past experiences but it was a challenge I needed. . .
So the first thing that came out of this New Year’s challenge was actually super negative. As I’m sure we’ve all realized at some point, some people are just garbage monsters! After sharing my focus for the year with a couple of people it came back to me that it meant I was a lesbian now (insert eye roll Emoji here). I took issue with this for two reasons. First was the obvious, that rumors are the most ridiculous things and SO common in female relationships. The second was that people are so narrow minded that the only “relationships” that could possibly exist are sexual or romantic. It really brought to light that people, including myself, don’t value enough the most important relationships we have, like being a friend, a sister, an aunt, a god mother, and even the relationship we have with ourselves. It did however make it VERY easy to know which people I didn’t need to have around!
On to the positive . . . the most valuable parts of this experience were that I began to pay closer attention to the strength, resilience, and excellence of women in my life and became aware of the effects of having this energy around had on my own life. Being surrounded by positive and motivated energy, you only have one choice . . . to be the same! Having people around you who, day in and day out, work hard, remain optimistic, and don’t settle for mediocrity, naturally ups your game. I have a friend that a year ago was engaged but now has two roommates to make ends meet to care for her daughter but still makes time to volunteer and donate to several organizations. Another friend who married right out of college, 6ish years ago and over this last year has embraced her identity as queer but maintains a friendship with her husband as they plan out their divorce, all while becoming extremely successful in her career. I could go on and on about the women in my life and their continued greatness through Cancer and illness, weight gain, loss of loved ones, unfulfilling careers, etc. but for the sake of time I’ll just say ALL of these women are amazing!
I think I wanted to write this blog as first, an expression of gratitude to these wonderful women and second, as a prompt to find a new goal for 2018. Something that is more specific than the standard “eat better, do better, be better”. I have a lot of small goals like read/listen to two books a month, lose 30lbs, show my artwork in at least three business or shows, but I need something new! Something, like last year’s goal, I would never pick for myself! So if any of you readers out there have any suggestions please, feel free, share! Happy New Year!